Something we may search for within ourselves is an inner parent who can call us out on any self-sabotaging behaviour that causes us harm, especially if we never received that as a child or still don’t have that as an adult.
We might be capable of enabling ourselves or others to treat us in a way that puts us in repetitive cycle where we may feel lost or in pain. The important thing is knowing we can do two things to help us because building trust with ourselves can mean we can one, check in with ourselves whenever we need to and two, support ourselves whenever we need to. It is about being conscious of our behaviour, be it harmful toward another or who we are inside.
Some may ask, how do we know if we are conscious of our own behaviour?
Are we able to step away from a situation in order to gain perspective?
The clarity we are seeking within a situation is usually within reach. It is within ourselves and in order for us to find it, we must be willing to step back. It is like being too close to a microscope and not being able to see the picture on the other side. There are many ways to find this clarity, though this means being proactive to see the results.
Neglecting the power we have in our life is like living in denial and we can unconsciously run far away from the prospect that we have as much as we like. Eventually we will see that only we have the power within ourselves to change our minds whenever we want to and only we can break and recreate whatever cycle that we wish to. It can sound like an intimidating thought that something we were either once told we did not have from a young age or maybe one we tell ourselves is out of reach, but perhaps it is time we trust that we are now able to do this ourselves.
With all of this, also means we have to be active ourselves and a part of us run far away because being active means promoting change within. We resist the transformation from the comfort zone because it is scary. Taking the initial steps are not only about breaking this pattern, it is about living a new life outside of what we are not familiar with. This is what gaining a new perspective is, and the importance of why ‘calling ourselves out’ is so important. In order to walk into a new life where we are sponsoring ourselves in an opportunity to put our needs over someone else‘s, is vital. We must learn the practice of putting ourselves first, perhaps if we were not taught how to do so or even if we fell out of the habit of doing so.
It is with all of these actions, that we can continue to create safer spaces for ourselves to gain acknowledgement for the true reasons we stay in situations that no longer serve us anymore – That is what growth is and that is how we take true ownership of our own behaviour and can learn the simple steps to break self sabotaging cycles.